They never tell the stories
Of the candles
That held the flame

They were monsters
You locked her in a cage with monsters

And then wonder why
After years pass by
She comes out not the way you want her

An onion of dead skin
Peel the layers
Find yourself
Dig too deep
Find someone else

I walk alone
Avoid the crowds
Hold my breath when they pass by
I wash my hands for thirty seconds
Cause it’s my fault if I die

Self-sacrifice for the self
Cut off your nose to please your face
Deny one half for the other’s sake
Both hands to give and none to take

Despite the aching in your breast
The burning void inside your chest
Dreams unfulfilled and put to rest
By every life you lived before
And every time
It’s for the best
The next in line will like them more

The monster was inside you all along, Dorothy
Clawing its way out
Breaking its way free
Made from a lot of you
And just a little bit of me

Sensory deprivation for the heart
Skin to skin but miles apart
Fingers curled
Legs like a vice
Locking lips and cold as ice

Feeling unmoored
Removed from time
Washed ashore
On uncanny isles

A distant sun
My only companion
My only witness

A new gender is birthed
In the eyes of desire
Fabric and leather
And just enough steel

Little did
My past self know
Half of grief is letting go